May 25, 2013 | 9:00 a.m.
I slide three shiny red jelly beans together. Trumpet blast. I put three lemon drops in a line. A xylophone sounds a jingle of approval. Then I get five purple jujubes in a row, and they snap into a single, multicolored, disco-ball-looking nonpareil equipped with deadly lasers. An authoritative baritone tells me that I’m “tasty,” or better yet, “divine,” and the squares of clear jelly I’ve been tasked with removing disappear with a satisfying pop — satisfying, that is, until, tantalizingly close to my goal, I run out of moves and lose the game, causing a little puppet girl with paper-fastener arms to cry. This game is stupid, I think. There’s no skill, no challenge. Then, like a lab rat pawing a pellet lever, I hit “Retry” again. And again. Soon, I’ve lost another 45 irretrievable minutes of my life […]