Al Gore as Gore-Al, father of Kal-Al

Aug. 07, 2008 | 2:17 a.m.

The Onion has a completely factual story about the former veep channeling his inner Kryptonian: 

Al Gore Places Infant Son In Rocket To Escape Dying Planet

EARTH — Former Vice President Al Gore — who for the past three decades has unsuccessfully attempted to warn humanity of the coming destruction of our planet, only to be mocked and derided by the very people he has tried to save — launched his infant son into space Monday in the faint hope that his only child would reach the safety of another world.

"I tried to warn them, but the Elders of this planet would not listen," said Gore, who in 2000 was nearly banished to a featureless realm of nonexistence for promoting his unpopular message. "They called me foolish and laughed at my predictions. Yet even now, the Midwest is flooded, the ice caps are melting, and the cities are rocked with tremors, just as I foretold. Fools! Why didn’t they heed me before it was too late?"

Al Gore — or, as he is known in his own language, Gore-Al — placed his son, Kal-Al, gently in the one-passenger rocket ship, his brow furrowed by the great weight he carried in preserving the sole survivor of humanity’s hubristic folly.

And you have to see the art that accompanies the story.

– Geoff Boucher

More in: Uncategorized, Politics, Random Silliness

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